I haven’t been around much, recently. I think I’ve been actively avoiding thinking about my CPTSD. I’ve also had zero routine, so making this a habit has not been a priority.
I started a new routine (or started an old routine over again) on Monday, so I’m going to try to work more on my mental health.
It’s going to be difficult for the next couple of weeks, since my partner and I have a trip to take, but I’m going to try not to let the break from the ordinary break my routine-building.
Life is a bit more vague than it used to be, before 2023. Last year was a kick in the pants, stress-wise, and I think that now it’s over with, life seems a bit less-put-together. Not exactly less stressful or anxiety-provoking, but more like I still haven’t gotten my shit back together from all the stress of last year.
Last year, my partner had a couple of health issues early in the year that were pretty stressful and anxiety-provoking. Then we had some large (but fairly routine, as in we do this every year) business projects that needed to be completed, and in between the health stuff and the business projects, I started an intensive training program.
Lots of things fell through the cracks, last year, and I had a lot of stress on me to complete my training program while maintaining functionality for the rest of our work. It was a lot to deal with, and in a lot of ways, I’m still recuperating.
Then, in the middle of all of that, I discovered CPTSD, and that I have it.
I started this blog back in September as a way to start dealing with all of this.
I think I just became overwhelmed with life and couldn’t deal with trying to heal from CPTSD. I needed a break. I needed time to just recover energy from the drain that happened all last year.
I think I’m ready to start working on this again.
I will probably not write every day, but I’m going to write at least once to three times a week.
Let’s see how this goes.